Beatty Cat and the Wresting Birds of Spring

The Warren, the batman, and the Ace

I see the birds on the ground wresting, and so the hunter batman strikes when they is busy. The birds is almost as dumb as the poop dogs, though they do not smell bad. In fact, they smell good and tasty. The batman wonders why the birds wrestle so much when they return from the vacation. The batman wrestles with the Beatty cat sometimes, but never in the open where fearsome killer pit-bulls can strike and not quite like how the birds wrestle. And the Beatty cat does not seem to have fun like the birds do. But the Beatty cat is not a master hunter like the batman. He is too fluffy and fat. His fluffy tail gives him away. The wrestling birds do not see it though, as they are too busy wrestling. This is how the Beatty cat catches the birds. Unless they is wrestling, the Beatty cat fails.

Did the batman ever explain the Beatty cat. Let me tell you the story. The batman excels at telling stories, not like the Microsoft Excel which the batman finds difficult to use. But not the Beatty cat, he excels at Excel.

Excelling at Excel

The batman was born is the 2006 and the man and the women took me and my brother, the Warren, away from home. Around the time I turned 1 human year old, the Warren got sick and the man had him put to death (I forgives the man because I know that I will see the Warren in the Kitteh Heaven). The man and the women saw that the batman was bored because they had not yet opened up the outside and the batman was alone (it would be many months before the batman was allow to use his superior hunting skillz). The Beatty cat came home one day and treated the batman like an older brother, by jumping on him and biting the bat ears. The Beatty cat was just a Beatty kitteh at the time, not the fluffy fat kitteh he is now.

Little Beatty kitteh

He is named the Beatty because of the Warren Beatty, the human actor who played the Dick Tracy. After the Warren was put to death, the Beatty continued the Warren's legacy. He is often referred to as the Beatty cat, I think because the man and the women forget that there is a cat underneath all the fluff.

The Beatty cat has had two great adventures in his life. Shortly after the Beatty cat became my brother the man and the woman moved from the Land of Dryness to the Land of the Trees. This is where the outdoors were opened up and the batman learned his hunting skills by catching the birds, the mice, and the chipmunks. Not the singing kind, just the regular. The man and the women went away for a while and left the big burly woman in charge. The Beatty cat got scared and ran away from the burly woman and when the man and the woman came home they were very sad. A human week went by, the burly woman left and the Beatty cat returned, probably because he is not a master hunter like the batman and wanted food.

Returning Home

Later, when we were traveling back to the Land of Dryness, the Beatty cat escaped from the big black machine and ran off into the trees. I guess he missed them. The man and the woman waited a day to see if he would come home but he did not and the man and the woman took the batman and continued to the Land of Dryness. The batman was sad because he had lost another brother. But a human month later, the man showed up with the Beatty cat in a cage and was crying. The batman did not recognize the Beatty cat at first, because he smelled like he a bath. But it was him, the Beatty cat had returned. The man says that someone had found the Beatty cat and trapped him in their big machine. Then they put the Beatty cat on a bird machine (so not the kind that wrestles) and returned him to the Land of Dryness. The Beatty cat will not tell the batman about his adventures, but he promised never to run away again. Now that we live in the Land of the Pit-bulls, the Beatty cat has joined with the batman to protect the woman from the ugly pit-bull beasts. But that is another story.